Saturday, June 25, 2016

Mental Health Attitudes

We all like to think we are mentally healthy but no one is one hundred percent mentally healthy. It's absolutely impossible to always be thinking and doing and living according to the what society considers mentally healthy. Actually, it's a day by day thing and rules one lives by or tries to live by. These, by necessity, must be changed according to new awareness of what we are doing or saying that contributes to our unhealthy lifestyles. And, in fact, society does not hold the key of anyone's health and for proof of that, watch or listen to what 'they say' or what they are doing. Mental health is a personal thing and each one must take control of activating it and yes, revising it whenever necessary. Therefore the only way I know to define mental health is as follows:

A mentally healthy person, or one aspiring to be one does not judge. He leaves that up to the creator or to the teacher or whomever is in charge of whatever uncomfortable situation one finds one's self in. He first must understand his own way of thinking and acting and getting rid, or attempting to get rid of, his own faults. Well of course we can judge on the general issues, murder is wrong, hate is wrong, envy is wrong, slander is wrong, cursing is wrong, overeating and gluttony  is wrong, and so on but before we can point fingers of blame as to who is guilty of these sins we must first come to terms with ourselves. It's like this,  we cannot condemn others without first looking inward at ourselves. Of course we don't have to be around those who cause us to downgrade our own mental health unless of course that's our job, they live with us, etc. But bad attitudes can be caught! It's easier to be mentally healthy if all you have to do is sit at home and think about it. How then does one remain reasonably mentally healthy while living and working among others whose attitudes bring us down? That, my friend is what truly being mentally healthy, or working toward it, is all about.

A mentally healthy person does not rage at others about their behavior. At least they try not to get angry. The best most can do in situations when others try to provoke us is to keep quiet. We try to show by the best example possible arguments or name calling or bullying behavior is best ignored. If it gets out of hand let those who are trained to calm down those whose behavior or actions are destructive to others. If not at least keep quiet or run or hide, whichever is possible at the time. Understand here we're not talking about criminal behavior but just run of the mill mouthing off at workplaces or at home.

A mentally healthy person tries to understand the other person's viewpoint. It's possible they may be right and you may be wrong. We learn from each other. Sometimes we are 'it' and are demonstrating poor thinking or behavior and if we are truthful with ourselves and with others, we will admit and will try to make amends. If we have overstepped and have said words offensive to others, we must apologize. That of course is humbling but that is what builds character. It hurts and our pride drops a few notches, but heck with pride, at least when a good lesson is to be learned. With enough of these situations certainly, at least we think, we will have learned when and how to keep quiet. But being human, and lessons needing to be learned, we will, most likely if we are honest and will admit it,  will keep on saying wrong things and raisin eyebrows or adding to gossip behind our backs. Progress will be made, however, when these bad actions toward others will become less and less. And of course, maybe we had a right to defend our position, or so we will tell ourselves, but after a while, a person who truly wants to become mentally healthier, will decide no action need be taken. Instead, we will work toward improving how we respond to the actions of others.

How then will we know if we have made progress toward healthier thinking? Slowly but surely progress will come. Each person will find their own way, but I suggest this as a clue: When you find you have no animosity toward those who you know gossip and talk about you behind your back. In fact you love them as if you are blinded to their negative attitudes. You see them as struggling humans, the same as you, who are trying to do the best they can do to get along in this world. Show them every kindness and never, never, give in to their gab sessions when it does not fit in with your life style. Don't agree with them but somehow turn the subject to something positive. As a example, if they say something bad about another, say something good but do it in such a way as not to offend them. You may be the example they need. Who knows but God. He created each of us for his own purpose and the least we can do, if we seriously want to improve our mental health is to leave the judgment up to Him. He deals with all of us in His own way and I believe it makes life easier and more mentally healthy if we accept that fact. We are His instruments of peace.


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